She then asked me if I had any food

Would You Share Your Protein Bar While Waiting to be Rescued

Jacobson’s psychotherapy office in Lomita, California, in which I was trapped with another patient in the waiting room for nearly four hours. The tremor was only a 5.5, but it was bad enough to start a fire at the nearby Korean barbecue take out place and the smoke was so thick that Beverly Marston, the other patient, and I had to wait canada goose outlet trillium parka black until fire fighters could penetrate the door. By that time Beverly Marston was dead from cardiac arrest. I was canada goose outlet shop fine, physically, except for some minor smoke ventilation. She was a heavy woman, perhaps three hundred pounds or so, and she was eating constantly inside the waiting room before canada goose outlet montreal we got hit by the quake. Out of the corner of my eye I could see her shoveling celery sticks into a large tub of hummus and crunching greedily and I remember being annoyed at her constant smacking and then boasting: «I don’t eat lunch. Every now and then while looking up at her self absorbed expression, canada goose outlet uk sale her tight blond curls and her flamingo canada goose uk site pink neck scarf, I would register a certain contempt for her and then return to re reading Eric Weiner’s The Geography of Bliss, which I teach to my college composition students, but in my messenger bag I did have something to eat if I became desperate: a protein bar, a disgusting, canada goose outlet uk fake noxious mix of processed ingredients, sugar, high fructose corn syrup, various canada goose outlet las vegas proteins isolated through the use of solvents, most likely canada goose outlet eu cancer causing. I doubted I would canada goose outlet online store review ever eat it, but it comforted me to know it was there in case while I was waiting to see my therapist that if I get stuck in the waiting room for a longer period that I could handle (anything more than 10 minutes), I could comfort my hunger pains with something to avoid passing out, which was how I often felt when I was waiting beyond what I planned for an appointment. But there were other scenarios that were cause for worry. There might be a widespread electric outage from a short circuited power grid, or a lockdown due to a prison escapee or two on the loose; or a hostage situation. Because I look like a hardened paramilitary operative due to a lifetime canada goose outlet orlando of hardcore Russian kettlebell training canada goose outlet , the hostage taker would see me as the greatest threat and would very likely go to great lengths to disable me, the muscle bound Alpha Male of the bunch, perhaps even injure me. During the lockdown in which I could be cooped up in the waiting room for an indefinite period, I might find myself famished and wounded canada goose outlet niagara falls and could keep my wits about me only because I had the foresight to bring my duffel bag with my water filled CamelBak, Eucerin «Soothing Repair Crme» (my skin cracks when I’m overcome with acute anxieties, which is nearly all of the time), canada goose factory outlet a 2 liter plastic beaker (my anxieties also cause frequent urination and a toilet isn’t always handy) and the aforementioned protein bar. Within canada goose outlet kokemuksia seconds , I was hiding beneath a chair, cowering like a child, fearing my death inside my therapist’s waiting room and afflicted with the terrifying question: What would God think of me during my Judgment? I was going to a therapist after all, not my Maker, for counsel, seeking a narrative of redemption and spiritual transformation through the principles of secular humanism, not religion. She was fretting that she had eaten all of her hummus and worried out loud that canada goose coats uk we might not be rescued for several hours, perhaps days. She then asked me if I had any food, or as she put it, «anything to munch on» while looking at my messenger bag, on the floor beside me, with predatory eyes that suggested X Ray vision. Plus she appeared insulated with energy reserves evidenced by her Michelin Man sized fat rolls. canada goose outlet in new york I must have looked like a primordial beast, hiding in darkness, a primitive cave, while operating under the grotesque instinct of unbridled self preservation. Better to have the nutrition and needed calories in my body now before things got out of hand. Then she collapsed and fell to the floor, dropping her paisley tote bag. A bunch of breath freshening candies, tiny pale red hockey pucks, fell out of canada goose outlet edmonton her bag and scattered on the beige carpet. I sniffed one that had rolled close to my nose and found its tangy watermelon aroma tempting but of course did not eat the contaminated candy. To get up and give aid to Beverly. But I made the decision that canada goose outlet woodbury it would not canada goose outlet in uk be prudent to get out from underneath the chair for fear that large debris might fall as a result of an after shock. I knew there was nothing I could do anyway. Beverly Marston was dead, apparently so anxious from our dire circumstances that her anxieties had precipitated a massive cardiac canada goose outlet online uk arrest. All I could think of at that moment was that the perfume she was wearing, an overpowering mingling of honey and vanilla, had the cloying, nauseating effects of cheap incense. I got up, not to aid Beverly, but to examine the contents of her tote bag. It was full of loose receipts, chewing gum wrappers, peanut shells, restaurant coupons. I scratched my fingers at the bottom and felt stale cookie crumbs, like gravel, collecting under my fingernails and then I felt a wrapper and heard a crinkling sound. I could discern the shape of a candy bar of sorts. I picked it up and saw that it was a protein bar in fact, similar in calories and nutritional information as the one I had eaten moments before. In spite of my standing next to canada goose jacket outlet a corpse redolent of cheap perfume, gnawing hunger pains compelled me to unwrap the bar, which turned out to be half melted, and I ate the liquefied bar as quickly as possible before anyone caught me in the act. I had melted chocolate all over my fingers and face. Strange, my first reaction upon seeing the fire fighters wasn’t the elation of being rescued but the embarrassment of being covered with melted chocolate. That was the last thing I remembered before passing out, apparently from lack of oxygen when smoke entered the open door, and I was carried out on a stretcher. You canada goose outlet new york could actually see me lying prone and being lifted inside an ambulance, a recurring image on many of the local news broadcasts for several days. I knew it wasn’t blood, but I wasn’t going to tell them I was eating a protein bar pilfered from the tote bag of the deceased.

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